I don't have a dog.

Granted, however you play and are crushed by the British, forming the Holy Brittanian Empire.

I wish for meh.

Xer0 \^/

Granted. You recieve yourself and die from staring at yourself too long.

I wish for a better use of my time

Granted. You discover gay porn.

I wish for a challenging 1v1 on WiC.

Xer0 \^/

Granted. You lose, cry, then kill yourself.

I wish for a nonobvious troll.

Granted. Look to the left.

I wish for the guts enough to kiss Mish. tomorrow..

Xer0 \^/

Granted. She then rejects you.

I wish for an Xbox 360

Granted, you get the

RED
RING
OF
DEATH.

I wish for blagh.

Xer0 \^/

Granted

I wish for pure evil

Granted... Nothing happens.

The evil has decided not to grant your wish, because it's an evil son-of-a-bitch.

I wish for a pack of Skittles.

Granted, and then somehow a gigantic rainbow bursts out of the package, and skittles start falling from the sky. At first not so many, but after a few days of skittle downpour it is impossible for anyone to leave their houses or drive their cars. After a few months, agriculture fails due to lack of water and sunlight to reach crops. After a few years, the world is a desert covered in skittles and fish in the ocean think they are swimming in koolaid.

I wish for everyone to have a sense of humor again.

Granted, However it is a largely sophisticated sense of humour that prevents from laughing at any joke that doesn't involve corporate mergers or stock market evals

I wish you would post in Help us laugh again

Granted however, all my posts would be "double posts".

I wish that you would not grant me this wish.

that's OK

Granted 'you' wont grant that wish cause 'I' did

I wish for a spellcheck

i grammer nazi kills you for failing.

I wish for Master of Magic 2.

granted, but it sucks.

i wish these forums would stop dragging me back.

and btw, HELLO PEEPOLE, I HAZ RETURN'ED wit teh lulzy lolcat speek

The forums stop dragging you back. You suddenly have a lot more spare time. You use this time to plot a nuclear terrorism operation and sell the plan to Al-Quaeda, with obvious results. That's right, NATO kicks some terrorist arse and save the day. You are silently removed by some CIA people.

I wish that people would stop reviving this thread. (Actually, I don't really, but oh well.)

granted, the threads die out, and the situation you describe happens to every active poster, needless to say, the united states are extremely embarrassed, and become the most strict and powerful tyrannical government in the world, which eventually leads to the events of code geass to happen(i put that in for you xero).

i wish i had more imagination. 

[offtopic]

You mean that the President goes mad and starts calling America "Britannia" and somehow the UK stops being "Britannia"? Or that the world gets reset from somewhere within the American War of Independence to cause the British Empire to somehow lose Britain but still hold onto all of the Northern and Southern American continents?

"NEVER try to make sense of an Anime, your brain will eat itself."

i was more thinking, the us becomes a dictatorship, crumbles to the ground, and Britain conquers it and becomes brittania, and with the huge in pour of US military technology, the events of code geass occur, but starting now, instead of when they were supposed to.

Granted, Britain receives a massive in pour of US Weapons, not the technology but the weapons, first ones dropping from suborbital trajectories baking bases and shipyards, then armored divisions and soldiers merrily carrying them.

I wish for the snow to cease for the next couple days.

Granted. It now hails brimstone, and all your neighbors desire to burn you at the stake as the believe it is through your sorcerous powers that you have done the deed.

I wish I could start a couple of Warhammer 40,000 tabletop armies, and actually game with them.

Granted. Your mind collapses under the weight of the number of rules you learn to be successful.

I wish that I wasn't ill...

Granted, you weren't ill. However, that's not to say that you aren't or won't be ill.

I wish to own a Marza Dreadnought in real life.

Granted. You are dead instead.

Granted. However, you have no idea how to operate it and no crew for it. Or munitions. Or fuel.

I wish that I could score with any (and/or all) hot babes I come across and like.

Side Note: I AM DA WISHMASTA!!

Granted, but playing basketball with infants having fever causes parents to act suspicious of you.

I wish that colonization of the planet Mars would start sometime soon within my lifetime.