The 'V Word' For Men

It took a while to get up the cojones.

http://www.vasectomy.com/
from JoeUser Forums
All right, I had to do it. It took a while to get up the cojones, but...

I had to make... the appointment. I scheduled it for the 20th of December. Merry Christmas to me, indeed.

I am going to Maryland Urology to have... a VASECTOMY.

This took a lot of gut-wrenching and soul searching for me.

My wife and I felt that after our fourth child we were done. We have always taken our kids one at a time, always trying to get used to the one we have before making the decision to have another one.

And with four, we felt that enough was enough and that we were done.

We looked at having a tubal ligation for my wife, also know as having one's "tubes tied", but that turns out to be much more invasive than a vasectomy. It also requires a lot of bedrest. And has a much higher risk of complications.

So vasectomy it is.

My first fear is the obvious. Crap. Why does it have to be that?! Why does it have to be my sperm? I mean, we have four kids. I obviously have above-average sperm. And it's good sperm, too. Obviously no motility problems. No birth defects of any kind in my kids. People will want this sperm. High quality. Free of problems. Am I doing the world a disservice taking these boys out of commission?

My second fear is just the fear of surgery. I have never had elective surgery before. I have had emergencies, like an appendicitis or tonsillectomy, but never anything where I said to myself that I'd really like to have surgery performed on myself.

One bright spot, though. At Maryland Urology, my doctor will be... get this, I kid you not: Dr. Shpritz! A urologist named Dr. Shpritz.

Thanks, God. Thanks for keeping it light and making me smile through this.
5,759 views 24 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Yeah, so I am kinda nervous...

Can you hear my heart go BUMP?
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
I'm impressed. I had a tubal because I was already having a C-section. We had a friend who had it done and we got him a case of Rolling Rock beer but we changed it to swollen rocks. ha ha. snip snip
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Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
but we changed it to swollen rocks.


Thanks, Loca. You're not helping. Was he in a lot of pain? How long till he was back on his feet?
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
Isn't just a local anesthetic? And like a fifteen minute procedure? You probably won't even have the luxury of a good couple of pain pills, buddy.

I think you're being brave though. My boyfriend and I have discussed this--and I've come to the conclusion that after our child-bearing days are through I'm still going to have to be the one in charge of the birth control. Which sucks. He just says there's no way he's going to let anyone hack on his nads. Maybe I'll just keep on having babies until he relents. Think that's a good idea?

Good luck, nonetheless, singr. I think you'll do fine!
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
Oh...it's also promising that your urologists "interests" are incotinence and erectile dysfunction. lol.
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
He wasn't in a lot of pain. We were just ragging on him.

You will make it through just fine and let me tell you from experience sex is so much better once you don't have to worry about the whole pregnancy issue. At least it was for me. I never realized how much it inihibited me until it wasn't an issue anymore.
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
I think you're being brave though.


It just seemed like a smaller risk of complications if I just did it myself. Thinking about her and all.

your urologists "interests" are incotinence and erectile dysfunction.


Yeah good ol' Doctor Shpritz. Shpritz loves the shpritzing.
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ouch. Why not just good ole fashioned birth control? I would think pills for her, and the little rubber thingy for you and you'd be safe. It's worked for me for 10 years.
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
Sing along with me men....
Purrrrrple, blue, and then there's black,
These are the colors of my freshly snipped sack!
Bwahahaha!

PS. Ask for the 10 mg of Valium 45 minutes before the operation; then you won't care.
And bring an ice bag in the cooler you leave in the car.
you can also use this for a few days of sympathy if the kids don't make your wife too crazy.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
Marcie, no it isn't always just a quick operation. I was in for almost an hour and the valium started to wear off.
D, The song speaks the truth......But it's still better than major surgery on your wife.
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
X-SPC:
Ouch. Why not just good ole fashioned birth control? I would think pills for her, and the little rubber thingy for you and you'd be safe. It's worked for me for 10 years.


And I don't want to have to sheath for the next... ummm... 20-25 years or so until Bonnie goes into menopause!

SSG Geezer:
Ask for the 10 mg of Valium 45 minutes before the operation


This is the kind of advice I need! Thanks Geez.

But it's still better than major surgery on your wife.


Yep, major surgery for her, on top of a couple days' bedrest, or minimally invasive outpatient procedure on me. Choice is clear.

Locamama:
You will make it through just fine


Also the advice and reassurance I need. Thanks guys!
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
I had one in the early nineties. Best thing I EVER done bar none. Can pole vault all over town with no worries now...
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top

Ok, want to hear from an old expert on this?  I will say, dont sweat it, and dont sweat it!  Thanks for my next blog.  Read it on monday.

And dont sweat it!

Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top

Dave honey, it's not so bad.  My Dave had one.  He was on percocet for a few days and had to sit on the couch with frozen peas on his crotch (the conform to the shape needed better than bulky ice cubes - plus you can refreeze them when they start to thaw)...but he didn't have nuts the size of grapefruit and the bruising was minimal.  He was up and walking around Wal-Mart four days after he got snipped.

 

And yes, I think that pushing out 9lb babies unmedicated gives me the right to say that a vasectomy isn't 'so bad'.  I'm sure your wife has earned the right to say that too....

Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
My husband looked into this as well.

However, he is a marathon runner and the Dr told him occasionally a small percentage of men with v's will have the feeling of well, um, a constant need to "shift" when they are running. The Dr said those men have to wear a jock when running....

So my hubby didn't do it, had it scheduled and then canceled. But I think its back on the table, shifting be dammed, after the 1st of the year.

He'd triple kill me if he knew I told anyone about this...so SHUSH!
Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top

frozen peas on his crotch (the conform to the shape needed better than bulky ice cubes - plus you can refreeze them when they start to thaw)

Now I know why I dont eat peas!

Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top
Now I know why I dont eat peas!


And I sure hope you didn't eat THOSE peas, Dharma baby.
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top

And I sure hope you didn't eat THOSE peas, Dharma baby

Nah.  They'd been thawed and re-frozen too many times to be good...besides, it wouldn't have been right, eating Dave's vasectomy peas.  No, they got thrown out.

Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top

They'd been thawed and re-frozen too many times to be good...besides, it wouldn't have been right, eating Dave's vasectomy peas. No, they got thrown out.

They should have been given a military send off!

Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top

We looked at having a tubal ligation for my wife, also know as having one's "tubes tied", but that turns out to be much more invasive than a vasectomy. It also requires a lot of bed rest. And has a much higher risk of complications.

Actually, it's not a "major" surgery any more.  It's outpatient, and only requires the same recovery as a vasectomy does (sore the first day, then you have to take it easy until you feel better).  It used to be a huge deal until Lap-scopes started to be used.  Now the woman can get a spinal for it (so it doesn't even need general), it takes less than an hour, then she goes home. 

The benefit that the women has over the man is that she already knows her Dr. from all the OB/GYN care that she already received.  The man...well...it's seems like an odd way to get to know a Dr.

Yes, now all the women can hate me......

Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
Actually, it's not a "major" surgery any more. It's outpatient, and only requires the same recovery as a vasectomy does (sore the first day, then you have to take it easy until you feel better). It used to be a huge deal until Lap-scopes started to be used. Now the woman can get a spinal for it (so it doesn't even need general), it takes less than an hour, then she goes home.

The benefit that the women has over the man is that she already knows her Dr. from all the OB/GYN care that she already received. The man...well...it's seems like an odd way to get to know a Dr.

Yes, now all the women can hate me......


Don't they have to "inflate" you for the lapryscope? When I had my ouchies done I think that was the WORST...my abdomen hurt so bad I couldn't stop moaning...ugh...*shivers*
Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top
The man...well...it's seems like an odd way to get to know a Dr.


They did ask me if I wanted a male or female doctor. I honestly told them that it didn't matter. A woman urologist has seen so many "goodies" that it is just all in a day's work for her. Plus I don't think I'll be looking my best before, during, or after the surgery. Hardly a time to be vain!
Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top

Hardly a time to be vain!

Or get excited?

Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top

Don't they have to "inflate" you for the lapryscope?

This is a good explanation of it: http://www.fwhc.org/birth-control/tubalig.htm

If having your abdomen filled with gas is what made you hurt so bad you couldn't quit moaning, you probably should think twice about having kids.  After childbirth, a tubal is a cake walk.  Matter of fact, it gives a Mom a day off for rest.  I went back to work the next day even though I was given a "permission" slip from the Dr. to take up to 3 days off (which is really no different than what a man will have to take off for a Vasectomy). 

I guess a big difference in healing is that the woman is healing inside where it isn't likely to get injured, whereas a mans is on the outside..in an area that is very likely to get "disturbed".

It's all a totally personal choice among couples.  I really don't think that either way is harder or easier or less "risky" than the other.  It used to be before lap-scopes started being used, but not so much anymore.

Oh, there is also a bit about Vasectomies on that site: http://www.fwhc.org/birth-control/vasectomy.htm

It is theoretically a less complicated operation than a tubal, but the recovery is the same except they mention pain a bit more with it than the tubal.