Mmmmmm...Hott Karl...

Some dudes in leather made Karly boy their bitch

Who likes sweaty, manly butt sex?

Hott Karl does, that's who.

Barnes Review News editor, Walter Storch, shocked the nation recently alleging chief Republican strategist, Karl Rove, participated in homosexual orgies in the Washington D.C. area. "Karl Rove was seen by one of my people entering a private homosexual orgy at a five-star Washington hotel over the Mid-Atlantic Leather (MAL) weekend last year," the respected editor commented.

This new info came as no surprise to Storch who, in a written statement that noted that homosexual activity is "trendy" on Capitol Hill, said, "Karl used to hang out at JR's, which is on 17th between P & S streets, before he became so well-known. This is a respectable gay bar for discreet people...," adding, "there is an expensive apartment...over near Dupont Circle that certain powerful senators take turns visiting with their pickups...."

According to sources near the White House, bizarre sexual behavior and homosexual fetishes are commonplace among America's politicians. TBR News has reported that, "one Supreme Court Justice, several governors (all Republican) and at least one very prominent televangelist" are engaging in a variety of lurid sexual activities that the American public would find distasteful."

Studies have shown that despite the fact that many Americans find the war in Iraq distateful, a much larger number find hott, bald, butt sex even more distasteful. Conservative politicians have already begun to hide under their desks (or at least that's what they claim to be doing) in preparation for the red-state outrage that will rain down upon them as details begin to break into the mainstream press.



So, if you've been wondering what Karl Rove has up his ass...well...now you know.






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18,065 views 34 replies
Reply #2 Top
Did you hear grunting and someone with a lisp saying, "Jesus Christ"?
Reply #4 Top
You know, it was just a matter of time before this came out. I mean...Jeff Gannon was A) a gay prostitute B) in tight with Hott Karl and C) given a lot of perks even though he wasn't a real reporter. Karl was BONING him. Or vice versa.

Monica Lewinsky is praying more comes out "Ooo, I hope Karl saved the tie he was wearing."
Reply #5 Top

You know why I seriously doubt this to be true?  If there was even an inkling of truth to it, Larry Flynt would have outed them long ago.

It should have gone into the Humor section.  It definitely is not political.

Reply #6 Top
*smirk*

I smell fear from the good Doctor.

When a man like Karl Rove lets a gay prostitute have open access, what are you going to think?

mahahahahahaha
Reply #7 Top
I only have one thing to say...


hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Reply #8 Top
I am having wonderful flashbacks to the Porky's II: the next day for some reason.
Reply #9 Top
Dr.Guy: Karl Rove is a politician, hence, this is a political article. Maybe I should go through your articles and tell you where they should be posted, eh? (BTW, I wouldn't be so quick to dismiss this as baseless humor...just hide and watch)

Everyone else: Thanks for the comments, hehe...
Reply #10 Top

Dr.Guy: Karl Rove is a politician, hence, this is a political article. Maybe I should go through your articles and tell you where they should be posted, eh? (BTW, I wouldn't be so quick to dismiss this as baseless humor...just hide and watch)

You post where you want to.  It was a suggestion.  But will you print a retraction when it is proved to be wrong?  Maybe that one can go in humor.

And you may not be so quick, but then neither am I.  I just voiced SKEPTICISM.  You know, like in I dont believe in the Easter Bunny either, but have not proven he does not exist.

Reply #11 Top
Dr. Guy: Hhahahaha...well, since this is not the best medium for communication, maybe I should attempt to clarify my tone when writing my reply to you....read it as silly and light-hearted teasing. (usually when I say "eh?" that's a dead giveaway...for me anyway...that I'm being "punky")

But will you print a retraction when it is proved to be wrong?


Hahhaha...depends on how I'm feeling that day...but I'm sure plenty of people will write THAT article for me...

*Wonders why we can't just let Karl love whoever he wants to love?*
Reply #12 Top

*Wonders why we can't just let Karl love whoever he wants to love?*

We can, and I really dont care. 

And I appologize for not getting your humor. I will remember the 'eh' in the future.

Reply #13 Top
No worries. It was my fault.

We can, and I really dont care.


Hehe...good to hear that...
Reply #14 Top
So this is why a lot of politicians are dead set against gay marriages because they want all their options for dates kept open (yes, this is a joke). But seriously, why isn't he an advocate for homosexuals? Why does he have to sneak around and then pretend he is straight when in the public eye? His denial of his true self will be his undoing.
Reply #15 Top

there is something bout ol karl that reminds me of roy cohn.  and j edgar hoover. 

Reply #16 Top
Is homosexuality a slur again?

You hypocrites need to outline the rules. Is there a particular season where you can make fun of someone for being gay, and then the rest of the year act outraged when someone else does it?

As for the "source", I suggest anyone interested go look at Walter Scorch's rag. It would be funny, if it weren't so sad. It's kind of like Col. Gene's stuff, only more deranged.


"Why does he have to sneak around and then pretend he is straight when in the public eye? His denial of his true self will be his undoing."


Duh, read the article above. Even if it is true, which I doubt seriously it is, who would want to come "out" and be drawn and quartered for being gay by people who supposedly have no problem with homosexuality...

Did I mention the hypocrite part? Yeah, I did.

P.S. you guys oughtta go take part in Reiki-House's Why Homo's Will Never Be Right. You can make the point that it is only reason for condemnation if the person in question is Republican.
Reply #17 Top

You hypocrites need to outline the rules. Is there a particular season where you can make fun of someone for being gay, and then the rest of the year act outraged when someone else does it?

That gets an insightful.

Reply #18 Top
I know what's up his ass, the same thing as every other politician. SHIT! It must be in their brains too. I guess all this illustrates why everything is so fucked, health care, social security, etc. because everybody is hung up up there.

oh yeah, like I said...

Link

Reply #19 Top
Bakerstreet,

Is homosexuality a slur again


Ah, I didn't slur homosexuals, I slurred politicians. I guess you should probably focus a little more on your comprehension skills before you start throwing your weight around, as in:

Duh, read the article above


The fact is I'm Australian and could care less what Karl Rove does in his spare time. All I want to see is honesty in politics. Yes, I'm probably being niave. But I would much prefer to be niave than to be subjectively cynical, as you appear to be.
Reply #20 Top
Hehe...well, I expected to get roasted for this...

Here's the thing...personally, I don't have a problem with Karl Rove's sex life although I dislike Karl Rove (hard to believe, I know)...just so you know, I'm an equal opportunity make-fun-of-er...gay or straight, it's all the same to me...

Did I mention the hypocrite part? Yeah, I did.


Oooooh...I got served....hahahaha

Reply #21 Top

I'm an equal opportunity make-fun-of-er...

Funnily?

Reply #22 Top
there is something bout ol karl that reminds me of roy cohn.  and j edgar hoover. 


What, the frilly housecoat and mascara?

Reply #23 Top
It's only a slur when it happens to people who USE IT AS A SLUR.

Karl Rove works for George Bush. George Bush isn't the kindest politician in the world to gays. So if his "boy wonder" is fucking men, that means it's a slur because HE'S A HYPOCRITE.

If you want to fuck men, then by all means, fuck men. Having spent the last week hopping from queer bar to queer bar with Ezra and Amy I've had one nice point "driven home" if you will -- there are some very kind, very good looking people looking to have a few drinks and dance. So go out and have fun with men.

But don't get into other people's bedrooms because you're ashamed of what you find in yours. If you do that, you're fair game. You want in my bedroom? Show me yours if you want to see mine then. Otherwise -- fuck off.

There's your rules definition. Being a fag isn't a sin, but being a self-hating fag is a shame and if you take it to the level of dispicable meaness that Karl Rove has -- well then your ass is grass if I can find a paper and some matches.

I hope it's true. That Gannon/Guckert isn't a bad looking guy. Karl was doing well.
Reply #24 Top
P.S. My problem is the culture of denial. Bush denies himself a drink, Laurie sneaks ciggies when the cameras are off. It's amusing.
Reply #25 Top
Hehe...Myrrander's got my back...

Well said, thank you.