Jafo - the quote above was from a Brit twit with tongue-in-cheek, as i suspect you well know!

"Stoop and you'll be stepped on; stand tall and you'll be shot at."

Carlos A. Urbizo

trespassers will be shot on sight, survivors will be shot again

Watch who you step on on the way up, they'll be waiting for you with baseball bats on the way back down again....

This is starting to take a somewhat violent turn. These are becoming less 'words to live by' and more words to die by.

Sign on rubbish removalist's truck...
"Satisfaction guaranteed, or twice your rubbish back"...

~When traveling~

Don't sit on a toliet after somebody has sat there and don't sit on the toliet while somebody is still sitting there.

"There are many methods for predicting the future. For example,
you can read horoscopes, tea leaves, tarot cards, or crystal balls.
Collectively, these methods are known as 'nutty methods.'
Or you can put well researched facts into sophisticated computer
models, more commonly referred to as "a complete waste of time."

-- Scott Adams,

I want to do my part of making this world a better place, but murder is illegal

Wouldn't that be also cleaning up the trash? When was that illegal?

Jafo

a friend in Maine, his father has a ceptic tank draining business and he had
to change the sign painted on his trucks, town fathers threw a fit when they
read "Your Sxxt is my Bread and Butter"

His wife wasn't much happy about it either

Oh and there is a guy who does handyman work down here with

"Rent a hubby, for those jobs your husband just won't do, or can't seem to do correct"

truck seen hauling porta-potties in Houston TX with this license plate:
4U2PN. oops, we're off thread again.

"Human history becomes more of a race between education and catastrophe"HG.Wells

One of my favorite pics....Called "Justification for Higher Education" http://www.art.com/asp/sp.asp?PD=10030522#

Guess what I'm sayin' is get an education.

"Live by the sword, and leave bloody messes all over the place..."

Oh, this isn't the joke marathon... my bad....

"the toes that you step on today may be attached to the arse you have to kiss tomorrow."

To do is to be. -Descartes

To be is to do. -Voltaire

Do be do be do. -Frank Sinatra

A winner is part of the solution
A Loser is part of the problem

A winner has a program
A Loser has an excuse

A winner sees or seeks an answer for every problem
A Loser sees or seeks a problem with every answer

A winner makes commitments
A Loser makes promises

A human being is or does all of these things at different moments in life...

Experience is like a comb that life hands you when you go bald.
- Navjot Singh Sidhu.

I like that un @shu

"Why does the Little Endian always get stuck with swapping the bloody bytes ?"
- Jagjeet Sidhu ( code slinger from Virginia) i think he would have gotten along well with Navjot.

An optimist will usually be disappointed.

A pessimist may be pleasantly surprised...

"Beautiful thoughts and beautiful women never last."