Ain't this the Truth!

from JoeUser Forums
This was passed on to me by my wife. It's simular to the suppossed George Carlin joke but a little different. It however is NOT factual.Enjoy!!!

Andy Rooney usually takes a liberal slant, but here
he is saying some things the liberals will claim are
not "politically correct"... and Andy will probably
say, "Tough s***!"
-----------------------------------

Andy Rooney said on "60 Minutes" a few weeks back:
I don't think being a minority makes
you a victim of anything except numbers. The only
things I can think of that are truly discriminatory
are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet
Magazine, Black Entertainment Television, and Miss
Black America.

Try to have things like the United
Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White
Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and
see what happens... Jesse Jackson will be knocking
down your door.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think
killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone
with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying
to ban you from driving to the ball game.

I believe they are called the Boy
Scouts for a reason, that is why there are no girls
allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU
LISTENING MARTHA BURKE?

I think that if you feel homosexuality
is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an opinion.

I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant
of others because they are different, weird, or tick
me off.

When 70% of the people who get arrested are black,
in cities where 70% of the population is black, that
is not racial profiling, it is the Law of Probability.

I believe that if you are selling me a
milkshake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a
hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter
of fact, if you want to be an American citizen, you
should have to speak English!

My father and grandfather didn't die in
vain so you can leave the countries you were born in
to come over and disrespect ours. I think the
police should have every right to shoot your sorry
ass if you threaten them after they tell you to
stop. If you can't understand the word "freeze" or
"stop" in English, see the above lines.

I don't think just because you were not
born in this country, you are qualified for any
special loan programs, government sponsored bank
loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel,
coffee shop, trinket store, or any other business.

We did not go to the aid of certain
foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to
defend their freedoms, so that decades later they
could come over here and tell us our constitution is
a living document; and open to their
interpretations.

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the
poor.

I know pro wrestling is fake, but so
are movies and television. That doesn't stop you
from watching them.

I think Bill Gates has every right to
keep every penny he made and continue to make more.
If it ticks you off, go and invent the next
operating system that's better, and put your name on
the building.

It doesn't take a whole village to
raise a child right, but it does take a parent to
stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds
when necessary, and say "NO!"

I think tattoos and piercing are fine
if you want them, but please don't pretend they are
a political statement. And, please, stay home until
that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at
your ugly infected mouth as you serve me French
fries!

I am sick of "Political Correctness."
I know a lot of black people, and not a single one
of them was born in Africa; so how can they be
"African-Americans"? Besides, Africa is a
continent. I don't go around saying I am a
European-American because my great, great, great,
great, great, great grandfather was from Europe. I
am proud to be from America and nowhere else.
politics
14,089 views 43 replies
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top

Reply #1 By: Texas Wahine - 11/17/2004 1:53:34 PM
snopes.com


Sorry but I don't believe that applies. Your article says 2003. Mine says within last couple of weeks (2004). But all that is besides the point. Nowhere did I say that this was fact. As a matter of fact I compared it to the one George "supposedly" did. I just happen to agree 110% with *everything* that is there.
Siege of Centauri
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
Sorry but I don't believe that applies. Your article says 2003.


Yes, it applies. If it wasn't his writing before, then it isn't his writing now.
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
snopes.com

Sorry but I don't believe that applies. Your article says 2003. Mine says within last couple of weeks (2004).


Yes, I'm SURE that after Andy Rooney debunked the authorship of the article, saying "Some of the remarks, which I will not repeat here, are viciously racist and the spirit of the whole thing is nasty, mean and totally inconsistent with my philosophy of life", he then thought "But it's funny, and I like a couple of things, so I'll just wait a year or so, change a few items, and then present it all as my own work on National TV."

Riiiight.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
Reply #3 By: Texas Wahine - 11/17/2004 2:03:00 PM
Sorry but I don't believe that applies. Your article says 2003.


Yes, it applies. If it wasn't his writing before, then it isn't his writing now.


Did you read my *whole* reply? Let me reitterate for you.

Sorry but I don't believe that applies. Your article says 2003. Mine says within last couple of weeks (2004). But all that is besides the point. Nowhere did I say that this was fact. As a matter of fact I compared it to the one George "supposedly" did. I just happen to agree 110% with *everything* that is there.


Same goes for you *citahellion*. Read the *rest* of my reply!
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
You don't think it's wrong of you to leave the part that wrongly attributes it to Andy Rooney in the body?
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top

Reply #6 By: Texas Wahine - 11/17/2004 2:57:21 PM
You don't think it's wrong of you to leave the part that wrongly attributes it to Andy Rooney in the body?


Nope. Not when I say outright that I don't consider it to be fact ahead of time.
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
You didn't say you didn't consider it fact, and I think it's incredibly wrong to allow others to assume that he wrote it when in fact he did not. I would be very angry if someone attributed something to me that I very much disagreed with . . . and then spread it around to many, many readers. But whatever.
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
Andy Rooney didn't write this.....I remember reading in the local paper some time ago that he was pissed off, and rightly so, I believe, that someone would write something so against his personal belief system and put his name to it.

I do agree with virtually everything in the article, though (I've recieved both versions, "Carlin" and "Rooney", in my inbox many times. I just delete it when I get it, now).

I personally think some smartassed Conservative just wrote it up one day and decided to pin it on some famously liberal person, just to stir up some shit.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
I say outright that I don't consider it to be fact ahead of time


If you had indeed said that outright, I wouldn't feel the need to argue this with you. In fact all you have is an inference that a similar piece was falsely attributed to someone else.

Read the *rest* of my reply!

I did read your whole reply. The fact that you draw a quick comparison to a similar piece is quite irrelevant to the origin of this piece.

Regardless of how I feel about the actual content, to continue to present this as a work by Andy Rooney after it has been demonstrated that he did not write it and in fact disagrees with just about everything in it or about it, is irresponsible and sleazy.
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ya'll happy now? Reread the lead-in.
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
drmiler: It has nothing to do with being factual . . . it's an opinion piece. The problem is attributing it to Andy Rooney. If you're aiming to please me (and I don't think you are ) then you could take the references to him out of it.
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
It is somewhat better and I appreciate that you changed it. But if you're soliciting advice, I have a simple suggestion for how it could be much better than it is:
Delete every sentence containing the word "Andy".

Then if you want, you can replace the George Carlin line with something to the effect of "it's an amusing rant in the style of Andy Rooney (though not by Rooney himself). I agree with it X%!" (replace X with a number of your choice.)
Reply #14 from PolMach Forums Top
Hey, I wonder if I can petition Michael Bore for the same kind of changes needed in his movies...
Let us have our cake and eat it too...YUM!!

Long live the age of subjectivity and propaganda in the world of Plinko!!
- Grim
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
Hey, I wonder if I can petition Michael Bore for the same kind of changes needed in his movies...


Inaccuracies and misrepresentations are wrong no matter where they originate from.
Reply #16 from PolMach Forums Top
Inaccuracies and misrepresentations are wrong no matter where they originate from.


Don't tell that to Karl Rove. They are the standard by which he runs a campaign.
Reply #17 from PolMach Forums Top
I'm not going to touch the political statements but I know a lot about phychology and I know that

" It doesn't take a whole village to
raise a child right, but it does take a parent to
stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds
when necessary, and say "NO!"

was an idiotic thing to say. This kind of form of teaching is about as effective as duct taping a kids mouth shut to teach it not to cry. I'd have hoped we'd have moved beyond this by now.
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
Reply #17 By: nyvelion - 11/17/2004 11:51:41 PM
I'm not going to touch the political statements but I know a lot about phychology and I know that

" It doesn't take a whole village to
raise a child right, but it does take a parent to
stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds
when necessary, and say "NO!"

was an idiotic thing to say. This kind of form of teaching is about as effective as duct taping a kids mouth shut to teach it not to cry. I'd have hoped we'd have moved beyond this by now.


I think you will find yourself in the minority on this. There is nothing wrong in smacking their butt when needed. Notice I did NOT say to *beat* them, I said *smack* their butt. So I do NOT believe it was an idiotic thing to say.I must also tell you that I don't care much for *psychology*. As far as I'm concerned it's highly over-rated and usually doesn't solve anything
Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
I think you will find yourself in the minority on this. There is nothing wrong in smacking their butt when needed. Notice I did NOT say to *beat* them, I said *smack* their butt. So I do NOT believe it was an idiotic thing to say.I must also tell you that I don't care much for *psychology*. As far as I'm concerned it's highly over-rated and usually doesn't solve anything


I agree...."spare the rod and spoil the child" has been proven again and again in modern society, yet people like nyvelion refuse to see it. "Stop that," doesn't work as well as a swat on the behind. Say "Stop that" twice; if they don't.....swat'em a good one. never hurt me or anyone else I know, nor did all the previous generations suffer horribly from a butt-smack.

Psychology, for the most part, is a scam. People go to therapy for years and years and spend a king's ransom and never get anywhere. I know...I did it. It's the only form of medicine where long-term lack of progress is accepted as normal. If a medical doctor did that, he'd be sued and kicked out for malpractice.
Another thing about that particular industry is how the first thing they want to do now is label you as "depressed", and put you on something. Everyone I know is on some kind of anti-depressant, it seems. Of course you're going to feel better about yourself, and life; you're stoned.
Reply #20 from PolMach Forums Top
Well then, you can go on hitting kids, and I'll go on using methods proven to actually work.

And just because Psychology doesn't explain everything, does not mean it explains nothing, especially when controlled studies have already been done on this and prove what is effective and what is not.
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
It's spelled P-S-Y-C-H-O-L-O-G-Y, brainiac.

Maybe that's the problem, you got hit too much as a kid and it gave you brain damage.
Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top

Say "Stop that" twice; if they don't.....swat'em a good one. never hurt me or anyone else I know, nor did all the previous generations suffer horribly from a butt-smack.


apparently youre correct.  if--when drmiler, as a small child, persisted in repeating something he knew to be a lie after being informed it was exactly that, blaming it on a cranky but  clever kid named andy who denied having anything to do with such crappy racist bombast--a guiding hand had zapped his ass a couple times with a switch, we wouldnt be discussing this at all.

Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top
Well then, you can go on hitting kids, and I'll go on using methods proven to actually work.


Tell me how a life with no negative reinforcement at all teaches kids respect for others and other's property and I'll go along with you.

Most kids today (and I manage a fast-food place, so I know teenagers) have no real respect for their parents, teachers, the police, BOSSES, anything. They were never disciplined, either.
My generation is the last one where corporal punishment was considered the norm. We HAD respect. We lived. So would they.
Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top
apparently youre correct. if--when drmiler, as a small child, persisted in repeating something he knew to be a lie after being informed it was exactly that, blaming it on a cranky but clever kid named andy who denied having anything to do with such crappy racist bombast--a guiding hand had zapped his ass a couple times with a switch, we wouldnt be discussing this at all.



Okay...point taken.
Reply #25 from PolMach Forums Top
Look, when I see parents get mad at their kids for acting up and smack them hard, often out of anger, I see something wrong with that. In my opinion, parents should NEVER take out their anger on children, but it looks like I'm not going to stop you.
By the I graduated 3rd in my class of 520 so when using the word brainiac to describe me, you were right, and saying that I spelt one word wrong in my first post doesn't prove a point.