The Gap

from JoeUser Forums

With palms together

Good Morning Everyone,

 

There are times when I am much less comfortable with myself than I imagine myself to be. Over the years, with practice, these times are far more rare and the space between what I "want myself to be" and "how I am" feels much smaller.  I believe this is a result of two things: first, my ideal is much more reality based and second, I have worked hard to be as present and clear minded as possible. 

 

Still, there are those times I would like to be more present with my family. Understandable.  Yet, I would also like to be seen as generous, compassionate, and patient.  At the same time, I am embarrassed to admit to these needs. I wonder where such needs come from?

 

Probably the same place as any ego need. Which tells me my "self" is alive and well and still crying for nurturance. Such a cry (or sometimes the vaguest whisper) is an essential practice tool. As we hear it, we should pay attention to both its quality and its source.

 

Is our need to be seen in a particular way a recognition within ourselves that there is a gap between our self ideal and our behavior?  Where does this "ideal" come from?  And what about our concern for people's  responses to us?  Is that our insecurity? 

 

We practice Zen in order to be real, authentic, present focused human beings who can be open and compassionate even under less than desirable conditions.  When we find ourselves wanting, perhaps that judgement should be examined as a call to action.

 

My own practice tells me I need to work on compassion, patience, and generosity: but mostly, on humility.

 

Humility is that gap between self and other: the smaller the gap, the higher the level of humility.  It is, after all, our sense that we are somehow different from others and the judgements about these differences that insures and insulates a self.

 

What do you have to work on?

 

Be well.

religion
1,899 views 3 replies
Reply #1 from Stardock Forums Top

Actually Sabrina, I find myself to be outrageously funny.  I wobble when I walk, am constantly sleepy and horny at the same time.  You are right, I suppose I could write something a bit on the lighter side. 

 

My friends and family laugh at me all the time.

 

Maybe that's why I prefer the company of one or two people over groups? 

 

Did you watch that wonderful night sky alignment last night?  Awesome.

 

Be well. 

Reply #2 from Stardock Forums Top

LW, I just read a piece out of Pirke Avot (Sayings of the Fathers) that suggested laughter and frivolity leads to lewdness.  Interesting in the context of my comment above. I knew there was a eason I shouldn't laugh so much.

 

Multiplicity - Control multiple PCs using one keyboard and mouse
Reply #3 from Stardock Forums Top

LW,  I think it was last week when my granddaughter used me as a horse and I was on all fours trotting around the house.

I think the rabbis were pointing to the serious need for study and prayer. But you want lewd?  We are just finishing a tractate of the Talmud that has devoted its entirety (a couple of hundred pages) to whether someone is a virgin if they lose their hyman with a stick, among other topics. One must wonder what those old farts were actually saying and thinking or drinking during those discussions.

Everyone needs to lighten up. True.  I'd like to see hope bloom in the world. I think Comedy Central is at least one small part of that.  Of course, you're a great help, as well ;)

See ya!