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JoeUser Forums
The last significant time of my life is right now. This battle with screw U TEP is the news of my life today.
Before this time was finishing of 2006 and entering 2007 fighting to keep my sanity. Before then, I was keeping my head down and trying to just get through it. Then I ran in to the financial struggle of entering 2007.
It has been depressing and exhausting. Through it all, I have trying to maintain some semblance of a normal life. I wonder what that is.
Today, a profound thought can to my mind. I was playing the Spanish Christian radio loud so the people around could hear it. After awhile I noticed that people were going about their day as is the radio was not on.
Then I realized that people are so closed to the goodness of God yet they have their back turned and their ears closed.
Today, I am seriously upset at the conditions of the world. People are very turned off and misguided. I do not see how any thing good can come out of the future world with the present day selfish and self-centered attitude of the average person.
Through everything I have confronted I have died as a person. I do not trust life. In addition, I am tortured by the thought that my life is over.
The only bright light is that maybe a woman would bring pleasure to me and a reason to feel alive. However, as I have said it would be a mistake to bring a woman in to the misery called my life.
I am very sure that things will not get better. Since I was 19 I have been trying to form a life and if I wrote a list of everything that went wrong you would accuse me of making it up.
All I know is that it has been a long twenty years. When I was 19, I was finally settling what I call my immigration problem.
On my eighteenth birthday, I received a letter from INS asking to settle my immigration status with in a month or leave the country.
For the majority of my life I lived the American experience. I knew there were things that needed to be done. However, I never recognized the significance of my “immigration status” until that day.
When I was four a came over to El Paso, Texas USA from Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico in a car with my family.
The customs officer looked at me. I looked at him. He looked at me and then He waved my whole family through.
Accept for a year and a half I spent in Eugene, Oregon I have been in this miserable city, El Paso, Texas.
Being the only child of my mothers born in Mexico has brought me nothing but trouble. To Mexicans I am not from Mexico I am Mexican because I do not think like them.
The American officials see me as a Resident Alien that is from a lower class country. Do I have a tail? Am I responsible for Mexico’s trashy nature?
It does not matter. It is just one more thing to struggle with. I however, do not pay it much attention.
I try to focus on what I have to do for whatever time I have left in life. Of all my concerns, immigration is farthest from my mind.
Meeting expenses and getting out of the cab are my prime concerns.
Before this time was finishing of 2006 and entering 2007 fighting to keep my sanity. Before then, I was keeping my head down and trying to just get through it. Then I ran in to the financial struggle of entering 2007.
It has been depressing and exhausting. Through it all, I have trying to maintain some semblance of a normal life. I wonder what that is.
Today, a profound thought can to my mind. I was playing the Spanish Christian radio loud so the people around could hear it. After awhile I noticed that people were going about their day as is the radio was not on.
Then I realized that people are so closed to the goodness of God yet they have their back turned and their ears closed.
Today, I am seriously upset at the conditions of the world. People are very turned off and misguided. I do not see how any thing good can come out of the future world with the present day selfish and self-centered attitude of the average person.
Through everything I have confronted I have died as a person. I do not trust life. In addition, I am tortured by the thought that my life is over.
The only bright light is that maybe a woman would bring pleasure to me and a reason to feel alive. However, as I have said it would be a mistake to bring a woman in to the misery called my life.
I am very sure that things will not get better. Since I was 19 I have been trying to form a life and if I wrote a list of everything that went wrong you would accuse me of making it up.
All I know is that it has been a long twenty years. When I was 19, I was finally settling what I call my immigration problem.
On my eighteenth birthday, I received a letter from INS asking to settle my immigration status with in a month or leave the country.
For the majority of my life I lived the American experience. I knew there were things that needed to be done. However, I never recognized the significance of my “immigration status” until that day.
When I was four a came over to El Paso, Texas USA from Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico in a car with my family.
The customs officer looked at me. I looked at him. He looked at me and then He waved my whole family through.
Accept for a year and a half I spent in Eugene, Oregon I have been in this miserable city, El Paso, Texas.
Being the only child of my mothers born in Mexico has brought me nothing but trouble. To Mexicans I am not from Mexico I am Mexican because I do not think like them.
The American officials see me as a Resident Alien that is from a lower class country. Do I have a tail? Am I responsible for Mexico’s trashy nature?
It does not matter. It is just one more thing to struggle with. I however, do not pay it much attention.
I try to focus on what I have to do for whatever time I have left in life. Of all my concerns, immigration is farthest from my mind.
Meeting expenses and getting out of the cab are my prime concerns.