Is this a fad – His and Hers Bedrooms?

My wife and I haven't shared a bedroom for almost a month. She sleeps on the couch every night!


I love my babies but I miss my wife.

It isn't a fad. Most periods in human history wherein a lot of people could afford larger homes had it. Americans have more living space per person than most people in the world, so no surprise that we do it to. I think most notably you saw it in Victorian England in terms of more common people. In terms of nobility it has always been a common practice throughout history.

Some of it now is decoration (his and hers bedrooms), some of it is just "personal space". We don't, but honestly I don't see it as any sort of great wrong. To be honest I wonder if it doesn't coincide with populations that have a lot of single-child families. I was an only child, and I tend to be a lot more greedy about my privacy than my friends who had siblings.

Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood. They had separate bedrooms.

On occassion, due to my snoring, I go sleep in the guest room as well. But not often.

Nope, we sleep in the same bed, in the same room.  It just seems sort of sad to me, but that is just me.

Both sets of my grandparents sleep in separate rooms. My parents do occasionally if one of them is snoring too badly, and I know I would have happily kicked my ex out of bed some nights. His snoring was so bad and nothing would make him stop.

Actually, I remember reading an article in... Good Housekeeping?... a few years ago about a couple that have separate bedrooms. They saw some adventure in it. Secret trysts in the middle of the night and everything.

As long as my future hubby doesn't snore, I'd prefer the same bedroom. I'm not a cuddle sleeper, so a really large bed that doesn't transfer motion would be perfect. And, of course, I'd have my own library with secret passages hidden behind the shelves if I really got to pick things.

Every married couple in my family (over 50) sleeps in separate rooms.

We sleep in the same bed, we even bought a king size bed once, but as weird as this sounds...it wasn't good for our marriage.  We got rid of it.  Too much space between us.

I like my space though.  My husband has RLS (Restless Leg Syndrome) so some nights he is kicking and shaking and I WISH we had separate rooms.  If he snored though, we'd def have separate rooms.  I am mean when operating on little sleep.  And snoring drives me crazy, I am a light sleeper I guess.

 

I love my babies but I miss my wife.

Aaahhhhhhhhh....you're so sweet! Tell her and I bet you she gives you a big kiss!

think most notably you saw it in Victorian England in terms of more common people. In terms of nobility it has always been a common practice throughout history.

That I do remember!

I don't see it as any sort of great wrong

Not really a wrong, just rather different I guess. I don't like sleeping apart from my hubby and neither does he likes sleeping apart from me. I guess we're just too used to each other. But we do require our individual times and do so when necessary.

Nice to see you Baker!

Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood. They had separate bedrooms.

I forgot that - I like that movie!

It just seems sort of sad to me, but that is just me.

I think it is too but as some people do it for health reasons, I guess that it is why they do it. And our response is why, as the article says, lots of people keep it private!

His snoring was so bad and nothing would make him stop.

When my hubby gets like that I hit him hard enough for him to wake up and tell him to change position and he usually does!

Actually, I remember reading an article in... Good Housekeeping?... a few years ago about a couple that have separate bedrooms. They saw some adventure in it. Secret trysts in the middle of the night and everything.

I remember that article! It is good that some couples will make an adventure out of it. In that sense I see the fun of it because it brings the couple closer together and not drive them apart!

I'm not a cuddle sleeper

Neither am I! My hubby is but he knows his boundaries when it comes to cuddling while sleeping!

I am mean when operating on little sleep.

Me too, seriously mean! I'm a light sleeper too but not if I'm really tired, then I sleep like a log!

I tried. I would roll him, punch him, kick him and he would move, but he would still snore. I actually hit him over the head with my pillow one night, and he didn't move a muscle. He finally woke up when I started laughing.

Fortunately for me, he wasn't a cuddle sleeper either, and he had a VERY large bed. He still snored louder than a freight train, but at least he didn't get on my side of the bed.

And I'm glad you remembered that article. I was hoping I hadn't made it up.

I'm with Tova. My wife and I have had everything from a double bed to a super king sized bed over the years. We tend to get along better when we sleep in a Queen sized bed or smaller. But then, both of us tend to be cuddle sleepers, so it works out.

I've seen families w/ seperate bedrooms, but it's not for me. I get lonely and can't sleep when I'm traveling and a large part of it is the fact that my wife's not there in bed w/ me.

I dunno. I want a king size because our bed always seems full of arms and legs by morning! We have a full size and we definitely need to get some more space to accomodate the extra inhabitants who start out in their own beds but invariably wander into ours!

I can see the appeal of having one's own space but that can be accomplished without sleeping separately. Of course, annoying or incompatible sleep habits are a different story.

I like sharing a bed with my husband. I don't like sleeping alone. Right now Izzy and I are co-sleeping, but I still miss my husband. I know when he gets home he will be happy to jump back in with me and his little girl. And probably the middle child too. He loves sleeping with mommy and daddy when we let him.

We have a king size bed, and I like having the option of being close or far apart in the bed!

I hate sleeping alone. If I could, I would have a backup for those nights. Would I ever chose this arrangement - hell no. If my husband ever suggested it, I would cry.

Honestly, I couldn't do it. But if it helps a couple to have a happier marriage, more power to 'em, I say!

And I'm glad you remembered that article. I was hoping I hadn't made it up.

It's all in your head....lol! no really, it left an impression so I remembered it!

I get lonely and can't sleep when I'm traveling and a large part of it is the fact that my wife's not there in bed w/ me.

It's the same for us too!

I want a king size because our bed always seems full of arms and legs by morning! We have a full size and we definitely need to get some more space to accomodate the extra inhabitants who start out in their own beds but invariably wander into ours!

I can relate!! We have a queen size and it's too small because of that! {and my kids are older but sometimes they wander into our bed when we're in the br watching tv and we all sit and watch together!

Right now Izzy and I are co-sleeping, but I still miss my husband. I know when he gets home he will be happy to jump back in with me and his little girl. And probably the middle child too. He loves sleeping with mommy and daddy when we let him.

Sweet! I remember when mine were that small, they were in bed with us! Like I said ours still come to our bed at different times. No matter what they're always our babies uh?!

Would I ever chose this arrangement - hell no. If my husband ever suggested it, I would cry.

Yeah, I wouldn't like it either if mine did!

But if it helps a couple to have a happier marriage, more power to 'em, I say!

Ditto on that too!

It just seems sort of sad to me

I agree. Aint gonna happen in our house. We love sharing our bed, erm, I mean, oh heck, you know what I mean

When my hubby gets like that I hit him hard enough for him to wake up and tell him to change position and he usually does!

Is that really you Rose?  You sound like my wife.

I think that it was a generation thing. How about the Lucy show? They had separate beds. I have neighbors in their mid 70s and they have separate beds.

Sometimes I don't like sleeping with my husband, but it's usually fine. He snores but I don't have any problem wearing earplugs. He hogs the bed but I've been known to climb out, go around the bed and get back in.   

But how about seprate regridgerator? We have two which my friends affectionaly refer to as 'his' and 'hers'   

When my hubby gets like that I hit him hard enough for him to wake up and tell him to change position and he usually does!Is that really you Rose?

Naw, that's me talking!!

How about the Lucy show? They had separate beds.

I remember that!

Sometimes I don't like sleeping with my husband, but it's usually fine. He snores but I don't have any problem wearing earplugs. He hogs the bed but I've been known to climb out, go around the bed and get back in.

! I've done that too! That's quite a comedic picture in my head! You half asleep and stumbling to the other side of the bed!

But how about seprate regridgerator? We have two which my friends affectionaly refer to as 'his' and 'hers'

I've never heard of that one!

My parents have seperate bedrooms. It goes in cycles for them. A few months they share a bedroom then a few months they're back to seperate bedrooms then a few months they're sharing again.

I'm not going to judge my parents or any other couple who want seperate bedrooms. Only they know what works for them.

What works for Rose and me is sharing a bedroom. Besides all the fun stuff, I also love laying in the dark with her, cuddling and talking about whatever until we both fall asleep.

Saying all that I would love my own 'personal' room though. Like a room with comfortable couches and recliners, a big screen TV, and whatever little things I love. Just so I could sneak off there every now and then for some alone time.

Only they know what works for them.

This is true Chris, different strokes for different folks!

What works for Rose and me is sharing a bedroom. Besides all the fun stuff, I also love laying in the dark with her, cuddling and talking about whatever until we both fall asleep.

That's sweet. I like laying in the dark too with my hubby beside me and I love playing in his hair!

Saying all that I would love my own 'personal' room though. Like a room with comfortable couches and recliners, a big screen TV, and whatever little things I love. Just so I could sneak off there every now and then for some alone time.

I understand that! This is the personal space time and if you can do it, great!

Separate bedrooms rock! You get a good and undisturbed nights sleep if you have your own room.